There are times in life when you can see the storm as it approaches and all you can do is prepare for the turbulence. Life can feel overwhelming and chaotic. Anxieties can build and often it feels like you should be doing something to help the circumstances, when there is actually nothing you can do but to take your seat, put on your seat buckle, and trust the pilot.
Right now, my family is in this very spot. God is taking us in a new direction and we are just trying to seek His will in all we do. In a couple months I will be transferring to UMSL and at the same time the hubby will be doing a training for eight weeks, in which his income will almost become obsolete. The training has the possibility of giving us more financial stability for the long run. While we are trying to walk in faith, it is tough. Sometimes I wish I could just have a glimpse of the outcome, just to know if we are going in the right direction. We are following His voice, but it seems so many things are trying to distract us. While at moments it can be difficult, we KNOW that God is good. We know that if we walk in His will, He will provide a way. We know that God has never left us or forsaken us. We know that God is in control and knows the plans He has for us.
I place my anxieties and fears down at His feet, but then keep picking them back up. When I try to carry the load on my own, it is so heavy and I feel the crushing weight of it all. Thankfully, I just have to cry out to Him and place it back down at His feet and He takes it and carries me through it.
I have so many questions. Will I get the scholarship? Will we find financial stability? Will we be homeschooling next year? Will we be able to get her into the private school?
While they are good questions, I cannot choose to be obedient in my timing. I have to walk in faith, knowing that in time all the questions will be answered.
God is my pilot. He is in control of where this plane will go. I have to trust Him to protect and provide for us. I have to stop trying to do things on my own terms because instead of helping, it only makes things more difficult. I need to be obedient and I need to prepare my heart and mind for the turbulence that is to come over the next several months.
I will keep trusting in my pilot. I will keep giving Him the control. I will also praise Him for all He has done and all He is about to do. I will praise Him for the places He is directing us toward and I will praise Him for the turbulence.